Henri 2, Paw de Deux - the perfect antidote to the miserable weather in Paris

Curled up with the fruit at the Marché aux Enfants Rouge.

Weather report for Paris: Cold and raining...again! If you could use a laugh on this miserable day, please watch this tragically hilarious video about Henri 2, Paw de Deux. Thank you, Joseph, for telling me about it!



Cats or dogs? I prefer cats. Stéphane prefers dogs. We don't have any pets.

Ever since my daughter told me about Dog Diary vs. Cat Diary, I've been trying to think of a way to work it into a blog about Paris. Now, thanks to Henri, I have the perfect excuse. Enjoy!

The Dog's Diary

  8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
  9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
  9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
  1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
  3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
  5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
  7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
  8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

The Cat's Diary

Day 983 of My Captivity

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...

From the Good Eats Humor Page.

Comments

  1. Ha ha, brilliant! I've seen that video before and it is very amusing, despite that atrocious accent (I know, I know, glass houses and stones...)

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    1. The accent is definitely noticeable - Stephane winced a couple of times! At first, I thought that the narrator is a native Spanish speaker but Stephane doesn't think so. We listened to it several times trying to place the accent. And speaking of stones and glass houses - there's no way that I would want to hear myself speaking French. Talk about awful accents!!!

      When is the premiere of Bob and your YouTube video?! It could be called "Torture in Tours"!

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    2. I was curious so I looked at some of the comments online and most people seemed to think it was an American, but I'm not sure whether that's people who are used to hearing a lot of French, because it didn't sound typically American to me either, but I don't know what it is.

      I'm afraid Bob is more neurotic Anglo than world-weary French, I must be rubbing off on him!

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    3. Thank god for the subtitles. I would have hardly understood a word of that terrible French otherwise.

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    4. Oh dear - just sounds like French to me! I wish I could speak French - it sounds sooooooo great! Loved the video, thanks. GM

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  2. The diary is hysterical! I read it twice! It's so true. Kitties are so complicated. I'm always reminded of that when I visit a friend who has a dog and how eager they are to befriend me. Cats on the other hand, couldn't be bothered. Now I can see why you got a kick out of my e-mail yesterday. How funny! It's like I'm "blogvoyant".

    Charlotte left us a bird's head on the porch the other day and we praised her for being a little hunter kitty! She wasn't amused.

    ...and I love that cats count days too. ; )

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    1. Now if you can just tell me what I'm going to write about tomorrow (please, I could use the help!), then we'll really know that you're blogvoyant! ;)

      That "couldn't be bothered" attitude is what I like about cats - although I have to admit that "Kitty Kitty" wasn't like that. She used to follow me, albeit at a distance, when I went for walks. After our daughter was born, she would come get me if I didn't go to Sara's room as soon as she started to cry. She was a great cat - I miss her.

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  3. Well, being a dog person, I wonder why cats are so often portrayed as in captivity, and superior to the humans, Dogs are portrayed as happy-go-lucky, hapless even, when of course they are brilliant and well adjusted animals.

    I wondered about the accent too but can't really tell one from the other. People still think I'm English all the time but I think I'm about as plain American with a twang of Southern as possible. Funny thing perception.

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    1. Interesting that people think that you're English -perhaps it's because we usually think of butlers as being British. I've noticed, however, that people usually try to place an accent and when they can't they quite often assume that it must be "foreign". While I think that I have a typical Midwestern (very neutral) accent, people occasionally ask me where I'm "from" when I'm in the US. When I tell them that I grew up in states from ND to TX, they surprise me by saying, "Oh, you're American!" You're right - funny thing perception.

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  4. Love the video. The cat's expression is priceless.

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    1. I love Henri's expressions, especially when he discovers that the cream in the bathroom is not whipped cream and when he's "forgotten on the floor". Thanks for stopping by!

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  5. The concept behind Henri 2, Paw de Deux is clever and the background music works well, but "Henri" the narrator has a terrible accent. It's obvious he's unschooled in the basics of French pronunciation, and to me he doesn't sound like a typical American struggling to speak French. Love the Dog's Diary, even though I'm a cat person (unfortunately without a cat in my home due to my husband's allergies).

    Patricia H

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    1. I agree that it doesn't sound like an American. The accent remains an enigma.

      Sorry to hear that your husband's allergies prevent you from having a cat. For me, it's my husband's stubbornness. ; ) The only time that I had a cat as an adult was when Stephane's brother, who's a vet, gave me one when we were first married.

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  6. Oh well, it just sounds like French to me, I can't hear the accent. Actually I seem to be able to understand French from people with accents better than native French speakers!

    Anyway...it is SO funny. posted it on my facebook page for my cat lover friends.

    Thanks Mary Kay.

    Denise
    Love from Bolton

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    1. You're on facebook, Denise?! You're so much more advanced than me! We'll have to talk about it when you're in Paris so that I can think about taking the next big step.

      I'm happy that you enjoyed the video. Joseph certainly brightened my day when he shared it with me!

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